In giving talks to various groups around the city of Milwaukee about the experience of Baba—how He came into my life (my life was saved from destruction thanks to Swami) what happened on my trip to India to see this Holy Man to receive His Darshan and to thank Him for saving my life, and how all this has considerably changed my life since then, invariably the expression "it blew my mind" is used. For it seems to say exactly what happened to me. The moment I realized who Baba was, the moment He looked into my eyes with His large luminous eyes, tears began streaming down my face. I was unaware of the torrent of water until it began to drip off my chin unto my chest. The moment He touched me and told me, "Don't cry ...everything is going to be all right now." It is true—everything has been all right—and nothing, nothing, has been the same for me. My life has completely changed. It blew my mind is the only way of describing these momentous events.
I have been taken to task by an acquaintance for using this remark. "Ange, why do you use that expression; it is so negative. It is awful! You are saying that your mind is blown up!" I was surprised at her discomfort and agitation she was angry with me for using that phrase—and she could not accept nor understand my explanation. But it seems the most fitting way to tell it as it is.
That favourite expression is still my favourite phrase when recalling my `Baba Experiences.' Baba blew my mind! And this is validated by a reasonable source—my inner being! What may pass as a negative in someone else's consciousness is a positive one in mine. For Baba did empty my mind of all thought, all time, all space! I was free, not enmeshed in a net of thoughts, worries, doubts, agitation—all were released into the ether ... into the void...Baba removed it all. I was filled with joy—with pure love—completely thoughtless, completely desireless, blissful filled with the grace that only the Lord can give! For the five days I was with Sri Sathya Sai Baba, I felt completely outside of time—the eternal had entered and completely transformed my being. There was a feeling of close kinship with all creation. It is difficult for me to find the proper phrases, the proper words to convey the proper feeling, to describe it all.
The only way I can is to continue saying: "Oh, Lord! You blew my mind!"
- an article by Angelina Marcotrigiano, published in the Sept 1983 issue of Sanathana Sarathi
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